1. Make The First Move⠀

As a person looking to connect with high value people, you have to be comfortable with making the first move. Networking up and dating up sometimes require you to approach people and start a conversation. Kim Kardashian is not going to approach you, you’re going to have to approach Kim. This is totally normal and there’s no shame in being the one to approach. ⠀

I know the introvert in some of you will be freaking out now but breatheeeeeee! This will push you out of your comfort zone but it’ll be totally worth it.⠀

2. Pay genuine compliments. ⠀

⠀For personal relationships, I use 2 types of compliments:⠀

 ⠀1. Compliment to establish and build rapport. ⠀

⠀2. Compliment to show knowledge and build credibility.      ⠀

These are by far my most used ones and they are not mutually exclusive, meaning you can pay one compliment that accomplishes both. ⠀

Compliment to establish and build rapport: I always find something I like about a person. If I can’t find it, then maybe I shouldn’t be talking to that person. Whether it’s a fashion accessory or how gorgeous/handsome they are, get comfortable with paying genuine compliments. Try to avoid closed-ended compliments. Ex: “I like your hair.”  All you’re going to get is “Thanks.” You want to compliment someone in a way that it sparks a conversation. ⠀

Compliment to show knowledge and build credibility: I met my BFF at a restaurant and I absolutely loved how she looked. That woman has a lot of style and is so beautiful. I noticed she had on an Apple Watch with the Hermès strap so I complimented her on it. “Is that the Hermès Apple Watch? It looks so beautiful on you.” Her face instantly lit up and she was ready to talk fashion with me from that point on. ⠀

1. I showed her I was knowledgeable about high-end stuff and built enough credibility for further discussion. ⠀

2. I brightened her day and built rapport. ⠀

⠀Again, avoid closed-ended compliments.⠀

 “Nice watch!” and “Is that a Patek Philippe? Wow! You have such great taste!” are two different compliments. ⠀

PS: When in doubt, go for the higher end option. Ex: If you’re not sure if his shoes are Ferragamo or Aldo, go with Ferragamo. With age, go younger. ⠀

3. Receive compliments well. ⠀⠀

As you get better at paying people compliments, get better at receiving them as well. You want to be confident, not cocky or timid. ⠀⠀

Compliment: “You are so beautiful.”⠀

Confident: Thank you so much for your kind words.⠀

Cocky: “I know that.” Or “So I’ve been told.”⠀

Timid: “Do you really mean that?” “Are you sure?” “Oh stop! I don’t look that good.”⠀

Compliment: “That is a beautiful dress and you look lovely in it. ⠀

Confident: “You’re so kind. This is definitely one of my favorite dresses and I love how it makes me feel.”⠀

Cocky: “It is a beautiful dress. And for how much I paid for it, I should look good in it.”⠀

Timid: “Oh this old thing?”⠀

4. Keep initial conversations light and fluffy. ⠀

No politics, no religion, no raunchiness. You want people to enjoy conversing with you so that they’ll want to do more of it. If you get into a heated argument over Trump vs Biden, chances are, they’re not going to want to talk to you again. ⠀

Practice makes a difference, believe me. I’ve been doing these for as long as I can remember and they have opened doors for me. ⠀

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